At last Patrick Hughes’ Diary of Indignities is headed for a bookstore near you. I believe the angelic lad on the cover (above) is Hughes himself — pre-D&D Magistrate days.
The book’s statistically improbable phrases include “poo water,” “ass blood,” and “saltwater catfish.” Says Hughes:
You just ain’t getting Party Melon and poo water and ass blood and Skinhead Katrina from regular books, and Amazon proves it. (I do know a guy who suspects he got ass blood, and maybe poo water too, from Skinhead Katrina, but they got ointments for that kind of shit these days so let’s not dwell on it.)
If you aren’t familiar with Bad News Hughes and his travails, start with Christmas 2005, his mom’s 60th birthday party, a chronicle of his anal fissure, or a dispatch from the Hoggetowne Medieval Faire.