An international guide to cursing

Curse + Berate in 69+ Languages isn’t just an indispensable travel companion. No, even in our happy global Internet village, there may come a time when you need to tell someone, in his or her own tongue (and from the safety of your own home), to go [expurgated] himself with an [expurgated expurgated]. Or at least there might come a time when you’ll sit around fantasizing about it.

During last month’s hacking debacle, I was particularly drawn to certain Russian phrases, including an after-dinner valediction that, in the interest of not seeing my site retransform into a Tramadol billboard, I won’t repeat here.

Still, it’s interesting to note that you only need a single Russian word — мулоэвон — to convey that someone “plays with his balls/bullocks and talks total and complete bullshit.”

Overall, I’m not sure which is more surprising — the variety of the curses, or how many seem to have counterparts in nearly every language.

Some of the more creative ones, in translation: ambulatory torn condom (Maltese, asshole); goldwash (Danish, blow job); speaks in farts (Hebrew, bullshitter); even rabbits attack a dead lion (Latin, chicken shit); you’ve got your ass open (German, crazy); the clown’s kiss (Spanish, menstruation); butt muscle cosmonaut (Dutch, gay); turd beetle (Uzbeck, miser); dead from sawing (Italian, wanker/copious masturbator).


Newsletter Signup

Subscribe to my free newsletter, Ancestor Trouble.


You might want to subscribe to my free Substack newsletter, Ancestor Trouble, if the name makes intuitive sense to you.