While laid up, I can only do so much sleeping and reading and stroking of cats before the pacing starts.
In this episode (Charlie), Howard announces his plans to become a novelist. His chirpy, poncho-clad friend, Vince, mocks him — “You don’t even have a pen” — and says he himself is already a writer, having produced several books about a character made of bubble gum. The following exchange ensues:
Howard: That’s not a novel. That’s the scribblings of a retard, Vince.
Vince: They are novels. They’re novelettes.
H: It’s in crayon, ya berk.
V: So what? I’m New Skool.
H: New Skool?! I’m talking about books that are gonna get published.
V: Mine are published. I published ’em myself.
H: You photocopy them, and you leave ’em lying around supermarkets, inside Weetabix boxes. That’s not published, is it?
Watch it, or I’ll be forced to quote the rest of the show.