Stephany Aulenback: literary almost-mama

Stephany Aulenback, a very dear friend and’s former, longstanding Friday blogger, has launched a new blog, Literary Mama, an adjunct to the online magazine of the same name.

Steph’s due to give birth in five weeks, and in her first post she talks about her past miscarriages, the impact of a successful pregnancy on her writing, and her mother-in-law’s recent sudden death:

Often made exhausted, weepy, and slow-witted by pregnancy hormones, I tried to write, fumblingly, about what had happened then and about what was happening now. And as I tried to pin things down in words — these fragile little floppy, half-winged arrangements of sound and letters not big enough, not powerful enough to carry the emotions and experiences I want them to describe — I believed, with relief, that I’d never again go through such dramatic swings from euphoria to despair and back again.

I was wrong. A month ago my husband’s mother died suddenly and unexpectedly in her sleep. She was only 59 years old. I have never seen a more terrible sight than David’s face as he shouted “What!” and “No!” into the telephone that had woken us from sleep at 4:30 in the morning, as he hung up and crumpled back onto the bed. I hate that horrible black telephone now. Every time I see it I want to smash it to bits and bury them under the melting snow and the rotting leaves in the backyard.

She also tackles the Ayelet Waldman debate in “Writing Frankly About Your Kids: Is It The Last Great Taboo?

I’ll be reading daily. (I’m just a stepmother, and a short, inept, long-distance one at that, but I try to tell myself that motherhood is a big umbrella. Right, CAAF?)


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