Scholars put off by the 32-line, text-message version of The Iliad probably shouldn’t visit the Four Word Film Review, where Troy is variously described as:
Trojans slipped on erection.
Pitt skirts around Troy.
Troy to stay awake.
And for Apocalypse Now:
Chopper, Hopper, acid dropper.
Drunk Sheen punches mirror.
Larry Fishburne reaches puberty.
(Via the Cinetrix.)