Private: Going to wash my hands now

Here’s a fine how-do-you-do:

An Israeli woman swallowed a cockroach and then a fork she used to try to remove the insect from her throat.

The winged cockroach jumped into the 32-year-old woman’s mouth as she was cleaning her home in a village in northern Israel this week.

(Thanks to GMB for the link.)

My own cockroach experiences, one of which is documented here, pale in comparison. On a related note, did you ever hear the cockroach/Taco Bell urban legend?

In other news, at lunch I told GMB about an old friend who recently called off our friendship because his wife felt threatened by it.

Although the friend lives in Florida and I live in Brooklyn, and although I wouldn’t touch him, as my mother would say, with a ten-foot pole, the wife accused him of having an affair with me.

“You’ve been a great friend for the last nine years,” his email to me said, “but I’m afraid I can’t talk to you anymore.”

GMB’s response: “How can he fuck her when his dick is in her pocket?”

Meanwhile, John Hodgman has some great stuff at Other People’s Stories. (Via Lindsayism.)

Jensen Whalen has written something new. Word has it that W. Gauthier Marx is going to run for president. The Antigeist is building a robot.