The Bad Librarian, a new columnist at PopMatters, dramatizes the potential consequences of the Patriot Act:
Mr. Fed: Gimmee that.
Librarian 1: Sir, this is private information! You’ve no warrant!
Mr. Fed: I said gimmee.
Librarian 1: Okay, here.
Librarian 1 hands over the records and sits down to weep fitfully. [Librarian 2 walks over to chat.]
Librarian 2: What was that all about?
Librarian 1 (sniffs): What?
Librarian 2: The guy with the Oakleys.
Librarian 1 (wipes nose): I really can’t say.
Yet our informant urges us not to sink too deeply into despair. On the bright side, he says, most Americans’ library records “are just not that interesting.”
Imagine if you will then, the scene at Homeland Security HQ: “Oh, look Bill, he’s reading The Rising, by Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins. It’s a hot one Bill, a thrill-a-minute! You’ll never believe it, but the Prince of Darkness chooses a Romanian woman to be the mother of the Antichrist!….”